Tuesday, January 25, 2011

"Next Blog"

Have you ever clicked the ''next blog'' button? I just had the most amazing idea creep up my lower lumbar, wiggle up onto my shoulders and whisper into my ear. I decided to go on a "next blog" rampage. I must have viewed maybe 12 blogs before i noticed a pattern. Everyone was exactly like me. There was all these tiny bubbles of life. Each one an independent ecosystem of values, beliefs, pursuits, rants, tears, happiness, experiences, laughs, and all thinking the same thought....i am so important. Worlds within a world, doing our best to carve out a niche in the minds of others. We want to feel like people recognize us. We want them to look at our shoes. "Oh, wow what nice shoes"!! We want them to look at our pictures. We want them to look at our minds, our words, and our accomplishments. "Wow, your so awesome!!!! I want to be like you." I admit here before the congress of subscribers....all 5 of you die hard Electric Milk followers...that i am guilty of posting blogs with that motivation. I have broken the 11th commandment of the sacred Jones Manuscript found in lost caves of Zanzabar. I stroke my ego!!!
I feel like my mom just caught me masturbating. I feel like she caught me and there is a sense of "now what"? Now what am i supposed to feel? i was afraid she was going to catch me, now that the fear is over, what should i be afraid of next?
Your in the Now when you say,"Wow i have been off in my head for the last 20 minutes, i want to come back to this moment" Likewise your free of the ego when you say, "Boy i have really been focused on how others perceive me, i must remember that how others see me has nothing to do with my self-worth." All that is needed is awareness. Just turning an eye onto the creature allows you to control it. For us humans, our minds tell us to open outwards. Mind chatter: "Look around you and gather the information provided to you by neighboring humans to evaluate your worth. What do they say about you? How do they treat you? Do they smile or laugh at you? Do they envy or look down on you? Do they want you sexually or are they rejecting you? " We gather up all the feed back and based off our software (conditioning) we make an estimation of how valuable we are to the world or really just the world around us. This is only one aspect of our existence. This is an accurate way to access your "tangible worth" to others, but is only a fraction of what we truly are.
This "tangible worth" is like the stock market. It changes every 5 sec. If we lean too heavy at any given moment and build our life around a peak or a low, we are very foolish. The foundation is ever shifting! There is no stability. True stability comes in knowing that there is no such thing as stability! Our "self-worth" is just an illusion we are whole. We are composed of the same thing everything else is composed of, we are part of One, we are One. There is no division and no part is greater than any other part. We discover this when we open inward and search the depths of our personal ocean. And after you have plunged into the dark waters, and gone miles and miles into the icy abyss, keep an eye out for a creature with an icon in tow that says ''next blog''. Its the indicator that you crossed into someone elses ocean.
And so i blog for you and me, for my ego,
for your ego,
for my Now, your Now, to know my ocean,
to know your ocean
To tell my story so that you can see its yours too
To listen to your story so i can see that its mine.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey trent,
This specific blog seems like your closest brush with your meta-talk (talk about talk)---thus, an effort to establish a vantage point and then a vocabulary for talking about...well...talking. It is a nice step toward looking at your place in our culture. As you said, you and I are just like everyone else. An American dwelling on one's own individuality, uniqueness, one's "own" philosophies/awareness is pretty much what defines a typical american. It's cool to see it in different words here on your blog. Thanks for letting me in on it. ---Stephen